Sunday, March 22, 2009

To love and to lose

Aside from my two besties here on this blog, I do have other friends, I'm not gonna lie, and they all do too. Since starting the blog, it's actually brought us much closer, we're more a part of each others lives, and for that I am immensely thankful. But, this isn't a post about how much closer I've grown recently with Lilia and Carolyn. It's a post about how things have gone very awry with another very close friend.

So, this past winter S and I had a bit of a falling out, and I was, am, really upset by the situation. I desperately tried to rectify it, I emailed, I talked to. Nothing was working. Recently, while talking to J, she mentioned having spoken with S. I was told S said she, "Didn't miss our friendship."

When you become the type of friend with someone where you're hanging out with them often, and occasionally, as rude as this may be, ditch your real besties on the weekend for this new person, that's not a silly friendship. It's not fairweather, and they tend to be pretty serious. So my first reaction to hearing that was, how could you say that? If something happened to me and Carolyn, I definitely would miss our friendship, the same goes for Lilia.

While pondering what transpired, all I could think of was how wrong the whole situation felt to me, and how rude this was to someone who tried so hard to fix what was broken. And I finally recalled that age old saying. It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Although I lost a friend, at least I had a friend as close as her at some point in my life. And for that I am truly thankful.

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